Friday, November 11, 2011
Saturday, November 5, 2011
THE NIGHT SANTA CLAUS WAS SHOT DOWN OVER FORT LEONARD WOOD, MO
Ok, since Christmas is almost at our throats once again like so many rabid wolves, it prompted me to recall, as best I could, the following:
It had to have been either Christmas Eve of 1967 or 1968 when Santa Claus was shot down while he and his reindeer flew over the housing area, officer and enlisted, of Fort Leonard Wood. We were living there at the time, one or two years after our family had lived in Italy for two years. Dad had just earned his second Chief Warrant Officer promotion and was now working as a civilian-clothed officer for the CID (Criminal Investigations Division).
Christmas of 1969 saw Dad on a hardship tour of Thailand. The rest of us remained in the-then officer housing we were occupying before he left. That being what it is, it had to be one of the two previous years that the Father Christmas shooting incident took place. Other than that, I can’t really be clear in my mind which of the two Christmas Eves that this occurred.
As part of his CID duties, Dad was in Asia looking into the black market trading that some of our soldiers were allegedly involved in that year. His absence stood out in 1969, especially in July, because it was the time of the first moon landing and walk by Neil Armstrong. I was allowed to take a picture of the old black and white Magnavox Console TV screen with the Polaroid Swinger Instant Camera of Neil’s first step. A historic moment indeed and an 8 year old boy captured it on film. The picture was sent to Dad in Thailand and of course he brought it back and somehow it has survived all these years in my own photo collection.
Regardless of which year it was, I was still young enough at the time to believe in Santa Claus; in fact, I didn’t learn the truth from my Mom until I had reached the age of, say, 34. I remember being depressed for weeks afterwards. I was still working under the assumption that one day I could go to the North Pole and be a dental assistant to Herbie the Elf. C’est La Vie, I supposed.
Anyway, whichever Christmas Eve it was, ’67 or ’68, we heard some gunshots in the distance that night. Not really unusual to hear something like that because Fort Leonard Wood was (and is) a training base for our brave and wonderful soldiers. Noises traveling in the air from firing ranges and tank maneuvers in the quiet of the evening were the norm. However, it was just a bit peculiar to hear that on Christmas Eve.
Dad took that opportunity to tell us that the rounds were being fired off at Santa because he had not cleared permission with Base Command to fly over. Therefore, Santa and his reindeer were shot down and killed in the interest of national security. Consequently, there would be no more toys for Christmas. Ever. This was followed by Dad’s evil laughter and the furtive, terrified cries of two boys who figured they were now shit outta luck in the Christmas Day Loot Department. Of course, if I’d been thinking clearly, I could have used that as an “out” not to have to “be good or Santa won’t come” ever again. Hey the guy was dead, presumably splattered all over the area where the Leiber Heights Theater was standing at the time, so what really would I have had to lose?
Of course Santa’s body was never recovered, but I’m sure Dad enjoyed seeing the panic on his sons’ faces if only until the next morning when there were toys under the tree. And without any Claus/reindeer blood on the gifts, as I recall.
As an adult now, or as much of one as I’m ever likely to be, I can certainly appreciate the humor in what Dad did. I don’t have kids myself, so I can’t pass on the brilliant hatefulness of telling my own young’uns that Santa was creamed by the Taliban (or whomever). However, I can be grateful and proud that that incident – along with many others – formed me into the twisted human being I have become today. It is that “twisting” that many people are drawn to; probably just as many are put off by it, but that’s ok with me.
As a postscript to this story, whatever year it happened, it was the OTHER year that saw Dad working a Christmas Eve homicide, I would learn in the days following Dad’s death. A friend of his whom I had caught up with in 2005, still living near Fort Leonard Wood although long since retired, told me that he and Dad had worked this “Holidaycide”. It involved a young soldier who got into an argument with his wife and wound up stomping her to death while wearing his combat boots.
The bloody boots were found in the housing’s attic which, as I remember from our own quarters, could be accessed through a hallway linen closet. It was a pretty slam dunk case and at the end of the courts-martial, the man was sentenced to life imprisonment. Wonder if he’s still alive and serving time at Fort Leavenworth.
And on that colorful note, let me wish you a Merry Christmas, amigos and amigettes!
It had to have been either Christmas Eve of 1967 or 1968 when Santa Claus was shot down while he and his reindeer flew over the housing area, officer and enlisted, of Fort Leonard Wood. We were living there at the time, one or two years after our family had lived in Italy for two years. Dad had just earned his second Chief Warrant Officer promotion and was now working as a civilian-clothed officer for the CID (Criminal Investigations Division).
Christmas of 1969 saw Dad on a hardship tour of Thailand. The rest of us remained in the-then officer housing we were occupying before he left. That being what it is, it had to be one of the two previous years that the Father Christmas shooting incident took place. Other than that, I can’t really be clear in my mind which of the two Christmas Eves that this occurred.
As part of his CID duties, Dad was in Asia looking into the black market trading that some of our soldiers were allegedly involved in that year. His absence stood out in 1969, especially in July, because it was the time of the first moon landing and walk by Neil Armstrong. I was allowed to take a picture of the old black and white Magnavox Console TV screen with the Polaroid Swinger Instant Camera of Neil’s first step. A historic moment indeed and an 8 year old boy captured it on film. The picture was sent to Dad in Thailand and of course he brought it back and somehow it has survived all these years in my own photo collection.
Regardless of which year it was, I was still young enough at the time to believe in Santa Claus; in fact, I didn’t learn the truth from my Mom until I had reached the age of, say, 34. I remember being depressed for weeks afterwards. I was still working under the assumption that one day I could go to the North Pole and be a dental assistant to Herbie the Elf. C’est La Vie, I supposed.
Anyway, whichever Christmas Eve it was, ’67 or ’68, we heard some gunshots in the distance that night. Not really unusual to hear something like that because Fort Leonard Wood was (and is) a training base for our brave and wonderful soldiers. Noises traveling in the air from firing ranges and tank maneuvers in the quiet of the evening were the norm. However, it was just a bit peculiar to hear that on Christmas Eve.
Dad took that opportunity to tell us that the rounds were being fired off at Santa because he had not cleared permission with Base Command to fly over. Therefore, Santa and his reindeer were shot down and killed in the interest of national security. Consequently, there would be no more toys for Christmas. Ever. This was followed by Dad’s evil laughter and the furtive, terrified cries of two boys who figured they were now shit outta luck in the Christmas Day Loot Department. Of course, if I’d been thinking clearly, I could have used that as an “out” not to have to “be good or Santa won’t come” ever again. Hey the guy was dead, presumably splattered all over the area where the Leiber Heights Theater was standing at the time, so what really would I have had to lose?
Of course Santa’s body was never recovered, but I’m sure Dad enjoyed seeing the panic on his sons’ faces if only until the next morning when there were toys under the tree. And without any Claus/reindeer blood on the gifts, as I recall.
As an adult now, or as much of one as I’m ever likely to be, I can certainly appreciate the humor in what Dad did. I don’t have kids myself, so I can’t pass on the brilliant hatefulness of telling my own young’uns that Santa was creamed by the Taliban (or whomever). However, I can be grateful and proud that that incident – along with many others – formed me into the twisted human being I have become today. It is that “twisting” that many people are drawn to; probably just as many are put off by it, but that’s ok with me.
As a postscript to this story, whatever year it happened, it was the OTHER year that saw Dad working a Christmas Eve homicide, I would learn in the days following Dad’s death. A friend of his whom I had caught up with in 2005, still living near Fort Leonard Wood although long since retired, told me that he and Dad had worked this “Holidaycide”. It involved a young soldier who got into an argument with his wife and wound up stomping her to death while wearing his combat boots.
The bloody boots were found in the housing’s attic which, as I remember from our own quarters, could be accessed through a hallway linen closet. It was a pretty slam dunk case and at the end of the courts-martial, the man was sentenced to life imprisonment. Wonder if he’s still alive and serving time at Fort Leavenworth.
And on that colorful note, let me wish you a Merry Christmas, amigos and amigettes!
THE BLOOD OF PATRIOTS
I recently received an envelope from Jo Johnstone containing the latest Western release, A LONE STAR CHRISTMAS, that has both her and William W. Johnstone’s names on it.
Wrapped and rubber-banded around A LONE STAR CHRISTMAS was the cover for this book. Due out in April of next year, the publisher sent this to Jo so that she could see the packaging in advance. As she has forwarded it on to me, I wanted to be sure to post it on this blog as well.
THE BLOOD OF PATRIOTS looks to be a mix between a political thriller/“invasion of American soil” novels that I will occasionally run across.
Anyone remember the 1980’s television mini-series, AMERIKA? Yep, that’s “America”, but spelled with a “K”. It starred Kris Kristofferson and Sam Neill, and was about the total Soviet occupation of our beloved homeland. Turned out to be a huge, legendary bomb and the butt of countless jokes on SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE.
I don’t recall if AMERIKA was ever aired again, at on network TV or elsewhere, but I can’t help but wonder if at least part of the idea for the program was inspired by some of Bill Johnstone’s own writings.
I’m anxious to see THE BLOOD OF PATRIOTS when it is released next year.
Wrapped and rubber-banded around A LONE STAR CHRISTMAS was the cover for this book. Due out in April of next year, the publisher sent this to Jo so that she could see the packaging in advance. As she has forwarded it on to me, I wanted to be sure to post it on this blog as well.
THE BLOOD OF PATRIOTS looks to be a mix between a political thriller/“invasion of American soil” novels that I will occasionally run across.
Anyone remember the 1980’s television mini-series, AMERIKA? Yep, that’s “America”, but spelled with a “K”. It starred Kris Kristofferson and Sam Neill, and was about the total Soviet occupation of our beloved homeland. Turned out to be a huge, legendary bomb and the butt of countless jokes on SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE.
I don’t recall if AMERIKA was ever aired again, at on network TV or elsewhere, but I can’t help but wonder if at least part of the idea for the program was inspired by some of Bill Johnstone’s own writings.
I’m anxious to see THE BLOOD OF PATRIOTS when it is released next year.
Friday, October 28, 2011
NEW BLOG ANNOUNCEMENT
Very happy to report here that extended family member Christina Buckner has started her very own blog. My wife Karen and I absolutely adore Christina and have come to think of her (and her siblings) as our own flesh and blood. One of my other blogs, http://anddahorseyourodeinon.blogspot.com is dedicated to both her and her brother, Mike.
Having known Christina almost from the day of her birth, it was a total surprise that in some ways she turned out to be very much like me. I’m not sure how this happened because there were huge gaps in time when I wasn’t around her, so I don’t see how my goofiness could have rubbed off on her. However, Karen and I could not possibly be more proud of her if she was our own daughter.
Christina and I share a love of bad movies and all other things absurd. I’m delighted to say that I was able to introduce her to films from my own collection which are universally acclaimed as “turkeys”. You know, films like THEY SAVED HITLER’S BRAIN, ROBOT MONSTER, SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS and THE TERROR OF TINY TOWN (the all-midget Western). It opened up a whole new world for her and for the past 1.5 years or so I’ve been exposing her to more and more films of this type. She’s been having a ball with them!
One of her many talents is her ability to identify the source of a problem and then pound it flat with her commentary until it seems much less like a problem anymore. This is a trait that a lot of politicians have, but Christina is much too ethical to run for political office, so the rest of us get to enjoy her wit sans the restraints of so-called political correctness.
Her inaugural blog entry is her take of last year’s re-make of the movie, I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE. Christina shoots from the hip on this one, so be prepared to laugh. Access her blog here: CHRISTINA BUCKNER'S WORLD
Having known Christina almost from the day of her birth, it was a total surprise that in some ways she turned out to be very much like me. I’m not sure how this happened because there were huge gaps in time when I wasn’t around her, so I don’t see how my goofiness could have rubbed off on her. However, Karen and I could not possibly be more proud of her if she was our own daughter.
Christina and I share a love of bad movies and all other things absurd. I’m delighted to say that I was able to introduce her to films from my own collection which are universally acclaimed as “turkeys”. You know, films like THEY SAVED HITLER’S BRAIN, ROBOT MONSTER, SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS and THE TERROR OF TINY TOWN (the all-midget Western). It opened up a whole new world for her and for the past 1.5 years or so I’ve been exposing her to more and more films of this type. She’s been having a ball with them!
One of her many talents is her ability to identify the source of a problem and then pound it flat with her commentary until it seems much less like a problem anymore. This is a trait that a lot of politicians have, but Christina is much too ethical to run for political office, so the rest of us get to enjoy her wit sans the restraints of so-called political correctness.
Her inaugural blog entry is her take of last year’s re-make of the movie, I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE. Christina shoots from the hip on this one, so be prepared to laugh. Access her blog here: CHRISTINA BUCKNER'S WORLD
SATAN'S SADISTS
I’ve never really been a fan of the so-called “biker picture” genre. In fact, I can’t even honestly say that I understand why the film “Easy Rider” is considered the finest of its kind – other than the fact that it had Jack Nicholson in it and his classic line of dialogue, “This used to be such a GOOD country.” Even the fact that a very young Toni (“Hey Mickey, you’re so fine, you’re so fine, you blow my mind, Hey Mickey”) Basil has a small role in the movie leaves me less than impressed. See BORN LOSERS – now THAT was a biker picture!When Al Adamson decided to do a biker movie, he cast his wife, Regina Carroll, as the female lead. Now there were two reasons, really, why this was a good move, and both of those reasons rested on her chest. Other than the violence factor, Regina’s melons were probably as good a reason as any to plant your male posterior in a theater seat and sit through this movie.
Regina died of cancer quite a number of years before Al himself was murdered by a sleazy associate. Al’s body was buried under some renovations that were being done to his house, but was later recovered.
Mr. Adamson left us a number of memorable “bad” films as a legacy, SATAN’S SADISTS being key amongst them. My personal favorite was DRACULA VS. FRANKENSTEIN. I’ve written about that movie before, but here is the DVD cover for it in case you’ve never seen it on the stands:
Regina’s first on-camera appearance in DRACULA VS. FRANKENSTEIN is in a Las Vegas sequence as a showgirl with her own stage production. How she made a living in the story as a showgirl is beyond me; having something like four people in the audience really does not extend one’s credibility as an “in-demand” stage singer. In the movie, she performs a number called “I Travel Light”. I suppose traveling light is a good thing, because not drawing a decent sized audience would necessitate that she pack up and make way for someone like Vic Damone or Liberace who could pack the place.
HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS, NIGHT OF BLOODY HORROR, BLAZING STEWARDESSES and BLACK SAMURAI are other Adamson “Alternative” Classics which I have on VHS, but have never seen on DVD before.
Rest well, Al. They got your killer and he’s someone’s prison bitch now. Sorry you were a homicide victim but I’m happy to think that you just might be reunited with Regina now and are getting to ogle her snack trays again, this time for eternity. Do us a favor, Al, and say “hi” to her jugs for the rest of us.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
THE MOST DISGUSTING COUPLE IN THE WORLD
For what seems like the longest time, my wife Karen and I have been occasional targets of snide comments, disdainful stares and sometimes just downright hostility from folks. Why? Well it’s because of how well she and I still relate to each other. The honeymoon never really ended for us. Therefore, we are the most disgusting couple in the world to a lot of those with whom we come in contact.
We’ve been married now for 27+ years. Friends of ours have referred to us as “DINKs”, which means “Double Income, No Kids”. The fact that we don’t have children gives us less reason to argue. And, more importantly, opportunities to walk around the house naked whenever we want.
The worst disagreement we have nowadays is which cat will take the blame when either Karen or I fart. I try to pawn the trouser trumpet off on Casey (her tomcat) and she will accuse Indiana (my tomcat) when Karen floats one of her air biscuits.
Specific things that have drawn the ire of people past and present:
a. Visible “passion marks” (also referred to as “war wounds”) on my neck, usually still there for several days afterwards (when Karen works on my neck, one of my erogenous zones, I’m helpless and just give in).
b. Showing affection to each other in public (but not in our respective work environments; usually it’s only people who aren’t “getting any” that would complain about us if we did this there).
c. Using cutesy little terms of endearment to and about each other (example: I call her “Love Princess” and she calls me “Moron” - isn’t that just precious?).
d. Holding hands or having our arms around each other like high school sweethearts.
If these are crimes (of passion?), then I must plead “Guilty”.
Laugh at this if you want or if you must, but living this kind of life ensures that I’ll be riding the “Nookie Train” for whatever time I have left here on Earth. In fact I think I hear the Conductor shouting “Booooooaaaaaarrrrrddddd!” now. Talk to you later.
We’ve been married now for 27+ years. Friends of ours have referred to us as “DINKs”, which means “Double Income, No Kids”. The fact that we don’t have children gives us less reason to argue. And, more importantly, opportunities to walk around the house naked whenever we want.
The worst disagreement we have nowadays is which cat will take the blame when either Karen or I fart. I try to pawn the trouser trumpet off on Casey (her tomcat) and she will accuse Indiana (my tomcat) when Karen floats one of her air biscuits.
Specific things that have drawn the ire of people past and present:
a. Visible “passion marks” (also referred to as “war wounds”) on my neck, usually still there for several days afterwards (when Karen works on my neck, one of my erogenous zones, I’m helpless and just give in).
b. Showing affection to each other in public (but not in our respective work environments; usually it’s only people who aren’t “getting any” that would complain about us if we did this there).
c. Using cutesy little terms of endearment to and about each other (example: I call her “Love Princess” and she calls me “Moron” - isn’t that just precious?).
d. Holding hands or having our arms around each other like high school sweethearts.
If these are crimes (of passion?), then I must plead “Guilty”.
Laugh at this if you want or if you must, but living this kind of life ensures that I’ll be riding the “Nookie Train” for whatever time I have left here on Earth. In fact I think I hear the Conductor shouting “Booooooaaaaaarrrrrddddd!” now. Talk to you later.
Monday, October 10, 2011
WEIRD AL YANKOVIC LIVE: THE ALPOCALYPSE TOUR
Won’t go into too much detail here on the track listing as you can click on the DVD insert above and see everything for yourself on the larger scan.
I did a write-up previously on ALPOCALYPSE, the CD, on another of my blogs when it first came out. You can read about it here: MIKE'S HOUSE OF WHACKS
It still amazes me that Al and his cast of musical genius idiots (Jim “Kimo” West, Steve Jay, Jon “Bermuda” Schwartz and the newest member of troupe, keyboardist Ruben V ) remain as topical, fresh and funny as they were when I was just a 23-year old kid watching “Like a Surgeon” on MTV (when MTV was still worth a damn). These guys have incredible staying power. The concert is fabulous and you get so much more on this DVD than you did if you saw the abbreviated show on Comedy Central recently.
Up until this point, I had not seen the video for PERFORM THIS WAY, so I’m wondering if Al’s face is digitally inserted onto Lady Gaga’s body in her BORN THIS WAY video.
I wound up buying this at Wal-Mart. To my disgust, Best Buy was only carrying it on their website and did not have any copies on site. Pretty frickin’ ridiculous if you ask me.
However, I encourage you to scoot on over to Al’s website and buy it from there if you can’t find the disc in your local stores. He’s at: weirdal.com.
Keep ‘em comin’ Al!
RAT BASTARDS #2: DEATH SQUAD
War book series kind of flourished once upon a literary time. When they did, you found a lot of them that were inspired by E. M. Nathanson’s “The Dirty Dozen” in toughness and content.
The Rat Bastards certainly fit into that category.
The Rat Bastards certainly fit into that category.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE
Wow, what a treat this was to see!
Frank Hennenlotter, director of such classics as BASKET CASE and FRANKENHOOKER, co-directed this one as well and provides some great on-camera insights/stories on the wonderful Mr. Lewis.
Hershell Gordon Lewis, along with his partner, the legendary David F. Friedman, started out making cheapie nudie comedies and nature (read: nudist camp) films in the early days of their respective careers. They were very successful at this. Then, somewhere along the line, they were looking for something new to do.
They eventually settled on a new type of picture, one which would splatter the screen with blood and realistic wound effects, designed to shock, disgust and horrify. Mr. Lewis christened these films as “gore movies”. With good reason, too.
BLOOD FEAST, the first of these gore films, really delivered on the promised shock value and cemented a place in film history for both Mr. Lewis and Mr. Friedman. With its success, several more of these types of films were made until they felt that their market for gore movies was drying up. The partnership ended amicably and each went off to do their own things.
Mr. Lewis went on to do films occasionally – his own and for others as well. He also is credited for creating what he calls “direct mail marketing”; the rest of us call it “junk mail”. So when the postman delivers “junk mail” to your mailbox, Hershell Gordon Lewis may well have had a hand in it. He probably made more lucre from that than from his films. Either way, these things have provided him a good living.
David Friedman is a fascinating man, too. A former Carnival Barker, he really is a walking Encyclopedia of Hollywood and the art of the “B” movie. I could listen to him talk for hours.
HERSHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE really is a tour-de-force. It clocks in at just over 100 minutes, but the deleted stuff adds nearly an hour to your viewing time. It’s absolutely fascinating and I wholeheartedly recommend it to those who can take all the blood. Oh, and also for those of you who can take all those bare rear ends of the boaters and volleyball players.
Although she is not interviewed for the film, “actress” Connie Mason (she of the “vacant stare”) from both BLOOD FEAST and 2000 MANIACS, is seen at the end of the movie on stage with Mr. Lewis while he sings the lyrics to “Robert E. Lee Broke His Musket On His Knee”.
A very BIG thanks has to go out here from “The Splatting Nun” to Frank Hennenlotter to putting this project together. Also, props go to Mike Vraney of “Something Weird Video” for putting this out on DVD through his company. It’s a marriage made in Gore Heaven.
Frank Hennenlotter, director of such classics as BASKET CASE and FRANKENHOOKER, co-directed this one as well and provides some great on-camera insights/stories on the wonderful Mr. Lewis.
Hershell Gordon Lewis, along with his partner, the legendary David F. Friedman, started out making cheapie nudie comedies and nature (read: nudist camp) films in the early days of their respective careers. They were very successful at this. Then, somewhere along the line, they were looking for something new to do.
They eventually settled on a new type of picture, one which would splatter the screen with blood and realistic wound effects, designed to shock, disgust and horrify. Mr. Lewis christened these films as “gore movies”. With good reason, too.
BLOOD FEAST, the first of these gore films, really delivered on the promised shock value and cemented a place in film history for both Mr. Lewis and Mr. Friedman. With its success, several more of these types of films were made until they felt that their market for gore movies was drying up. The partnership ended amicably and each went off to do their own things.
Mr. Lewis went on to do films occasionally – his own and for others as well. He also is credited for creating what he calls “direct mail marketing”; the rest of us call it “junk mail”. So when the postman delivers “junk mail” to your mailbox, Hershell Gordon Lewis may well have had a hand in it. He probably made more lucre from that than from his films. Either way, these things have provided him a good living.
David Friedman is a fascinating man, too. A former Carnival Barker, he really is a walking Encyclopedia of Hollywood and the art of the “B” movie. I could listen to him talk for hours.
HERSHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE really is a tour-de-force. It clocks in at just over 100 minutes, but the deleted stuff adds nearly an hour to your viewing time. It’s absolutely fascinating and I wholeheartedly recommend it to those who can take all the blood. Oh, and also for those of you who can take all those bare rear ends of the boaters and volleyball players.
Although she is not interviewed for the film, “actress” Connie Mason (she of the “vacant stare”) from both BLOOD FEAST and 2000 MANIACS, is seen at the end of the movie on stage with Mr. Lewis while he sings the lyrics to “Robert E. Lee Broke His Musket On His Knee”.
A very BIG thanks has to go out here from “The Splatting Nun” to Frank Hennenlotter to putting this project together. Also, props go to Mike Vraney of “Something Weird Video” for putting this out on DVD through his company. It’s a marriage made in Gore Heaven.
BLACKENSTEIN (ON DVD!!!)
Recently I wrote a status on my Facebook page which reads, in part: “You all know that too many times life kicks you in the teeth, throws fast curveballs. But, every once in a while, it rewards you, too. My reward? Finally finding ‘Blackenstein’ on DVD. It was…sitting there amongst those unsold copies of all the ‘Friday the 13th’ movies.”Many moons ago I wrote on one of my blogs (don’t remember which one now) about this movie – which I’d only had at the time on a VERY bad VHS. It was one of those cheap tapes, done in the SLP mode by Xenon Video. Somehow the poor quality of the tape sort of enhanced my “enjoyment” of this film. Well that, and all the “Dolemite” previews, too.
So now we have “Blackenstein” on DVD. It’s a funny old world, isn’t it? Now I’ve just gotta find “Black the Ripper” and “Dr. Black & Mr. Hyde”. Already have the “Blacula” movies, so I’m halfway to my goal.
Not much really to say about this movie, except that it’s dumb – almost beyond measure. I’d read somewhere that American International Pictures had planned a sequel which was to be called “The Fall of the House of Blackenstein”, but since the original here layed a big ol’ egg at the box office, plans were subsequently scrapped.
ICE CREAM MAN/JACK FROST 2
Ok, now here’s a momentous double feature for ya!
ICE CREAM MAN works well as a horror movie, thanks in large part to the wonderful but always creepy-looking Clint Howard (Ron Howard’s younger brother and former child star of the TV series “Gentle Ben”).
The story concerns Greg, a former mental patient, who now is kind of like Ed Gein (Google this name if you’ve never heard of him) crossed with the Good Humor Man.
As if that premise wasn’t enough to intrigue you, David Naughton’s head is used as an ice cream cone topper later in the film. How could you NOT love a movie like that?
JACK FROST 2 (Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman) is one I haven’t actually seen yet. I did see the original JACK FROST some years ago, and I remember it being weird and not all that funny, considering that the killer snowman was tossing off one-liners like a serial-killing Henny Youngman. However, I have to admit that I am mildly curious about this one, so I’ll get up one early weekend morning and watch it before my better half rises to greet the new day.
If this movie turns out to be worth writing further about I will certainly do so, faithful ones.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
ALICE COOPER: WELCOME 2 MY NIGHTMARE
First off, my thanks and stuff like that goes out to Mike Dickerson for making me aware of the existence of the “Welcome 2 My Nightmare” (hereafter W2MN) CD. Both he and I belong to an online Alan Parsons Project Appreciation List (“Roadkill”), and it was Mike who posted info about W2MN there.
Been an Alice Cooper fan since the days when I became aware that my parents hated him. Upon learning this I absolutely HAD to find out what this guy was all about. It wasn’t easy, because Alice was a forbidden topic in the house and had been since the days his album “Billion Dollar Babies” was new.
Well, time passed and I became an adult – ok, as much of an adult as I’m ever likely to be – and listening to Alice became a cause célèbre in my apartment (later, a house). I became enthralled with albums such as “Alice Cooper Goes to Hell” and W2MN’s classic predecessor, “Welcome to My Nightmare”. Despite Alice’s personal troubles with alcohol and such, I found that he maintained his sense of humor through his music.
Pop once spotted the “Welcome to My Nightmare” CD in my abode, picked it up, took a look at the songs on it and declared with a grimace that “Only Women Bleed” was about “a woman’s period.” I didn’t bother to correct him because I could see he already had his mind made up. I came to the conclusion that Pop had the depth of a thimble.
On the other hand, and at a different day and time, I played “Only Women Bleed” for my Mom without telling her who was doing the song. She understood that the singer meant that women bleed emotionally and declared that the man doing the song had a “nice voice”, too. She was quite surprised when I told her she had just listened to an Alice Cooper song.
Guess she changed her mind about Alice, because some years later she bought me Alice’s “The Last Temptation” for one of my birthdays. Apparently, Mom was more hip than I thought. She found it interesting that Glen Campbell once said that one of his best friends (and golfing buddies) was Alice Cooper. Looks like Alice was ok in my Mom’s eyes from that point up until the day she died.
So, to the W2MN CD.
I’m happy to report that time has not dulled Alice’s razor-sharp wit one iota. Proof? Song titles such as “Ghouls Gone Wild” (which sounds like Alice’s version of a surf song), “Disco Bloodbath Boogie Fever” (an Alice “rap” of sorts) and “I’ll Bite Your Face Off” (about an undead dominatrix, I guess). These songs really resonate, though; they’re what makes Alice who he is and I say Thank God for him!
The rest of the CD is vintage Alice Cooper as well; not a bad song in the bunch. Welcome back, Alice! We can always count on you to re-appear when pop music starts to become too “nice”. Or bland. Or nauseatingly Bieber-ish.
Now, if we could only get Alice to release albums like “Zipper Catches Skin” and “Da-Da” on CD.
Further proof that Alice hasn’t lost it came when I ran across an interview in progress that Joy Behar (no, I don’t normally watch her) recently did with him. When asked if he believed Gene Simmons’ claim to have slept with over 5,000 women, Alice deadpanned, “At once?” Gotta love it!
Been an Alice Cooper fan since the days when I became aware that my parents hated him. Upon learning this I absolutely HAD to find out what this guy was all about. It wasn’t easy, because Alice was a forbidden topic in the house and had been since the days his album “Billion Dollar Babies” was new.
Well, time passed and I became an adult – ok, as much of an adult as I’m ever likely to be – and listening to Alice became a cause célèbre in my apartment (later, a house). I became enthralled with albums such as “Alice Cooper Goes to Hell” and W2MN’s classic predecessor, “Welcome to My Nightmare”. Despite Alice’s personal troubles with alcohol and such, I found that he maintained his sense of humor through his music.
Pop once spotted the “Welcome to My Nightmare” CD in my abode, picked it up, took a look at the songs on it and declared with a grimace that “Only Women Bleed” was about “a woman’s period.” I didn’t bother to correct him because I could see he already had his mind made up. I came to the conclusion that Pop had the depth of a thimble.
On the other hand, and at a different day and time, I played “Only Women Bleed” for my Mom without telling her who was doing the song. She understood that the singer meant that women bleed emotionally and declared that the man doing the song had a “nice voice”, too. She was quite surprised when I told her she had just listened to an Alice Cooper song.
Guess she changed her mind about Alice, because some years later she bought me Alice’s “The Last Temptation” for one of my birthdays. Apparently, Mom was more hip than I thought. She found it interesting that Glen Campbell once said that one of his best friends (and golfing buddies) was Alice Cooper. Looks like Alice was ok in my Mom’s eyes from that point up until the day she died.
So, to the W2MN CD.
I’m happy to report that time has not dulled Alice’s razor-sharp wit one iota. Proof? Song titles such as “Ghouls Gone Wild” (which sounds like Alice’s version of a surf song), “Disco Bloodbath Boogie Fever” (an Alice “rap” of sorts) and “I’ll Bite Your Face Off” (about an undead dominatrix, I guess). These songs really resonate, though; they’re what makes Alice who he is and I say Thank God for him!
The rest of the CD is vintage Alice Cooper as well; not a bad song in the bunch. Welcome back, Alice! We can always count on you to re-appear when pop music starts to become too “nice”. Or bland. Or nauseatingly Bieber-ish.
Now, if we could only get Alice to release albums like “Zipper Catches Skin” and “Da-Da” on CD.
Further proof that Alice hasn’t lost it came when I ran across an interview in progress that Joy Behar (no, I don’t normally watch her) recently did with him. When asked if he believed Gene Simmons’ claim to have slept with over 5,000 women, Alice deadpanned, “At once?” Gotta love it!
A CHRISTMAS FAMILY TRAGEDY
(Note: this write-up has also been posted at my true crime blog, http://detectivemagazineheaven.blogspot.com/)
Every once in a great while, quite by accident usually, Karen or I will stumble across a documentary about a murder case with which we are completely unfamiliar. Such is the case with “A Christmas Family Tragedy: Legends of the 1929 Lawson Family Murders”. Karen found this DVD at one of the St. Louis County Library branches and immediately grabbed it. In turn, it “grabbed” us as well as we sat down to watch it.
It tells the story of Germanton, North Carolina, tobacco farmer Charles (Charlie) Lawson and how, one cold and snowy Christmas morning, he blitzkrieged his family and, climactically, turned the shotgun on himself. He also used the firearm as a bludgeon during the attacks.
The victims were Charlie’s wife, Fannie, and six of their seven children: Maybell (7), Mary Lou (4 months), Marie (17), James William (4), Raymond (2) and Carrie (12).
The oldest male child at 16, James Arthur Lawson (yes, there were two boys in the Lawson house named James), aka “Buck”, had been sent into town just minutes earlier to purchase more shotgun shells, not knowing that his father would pretty much use up the shells he’d had on hand then and there to commit the murders.
Had Buck returned to the farm just a bit sooner, he, too, would have been a victim. As it turned out, Buck, in the years that followed, had a hard time living with what happened and it drove him to drink. He was killed at the age of 32 in 1945 in a truck accident.
Ironically, the name Buck Lawson would be used as the “hero” for Billy Curtis’s character (a coinkydink, I’m sure) in the all-midget Western, “The Terror of Tiny Town” in 1938, some 9 years after the Lawson tragedy.
A ballad was written about the Lawson murders the year after the murders. It was recorded a number of times and in the end credits of the film, you hear a woman singing it acapella.
“A Christmas Family Tragedy” is a fascinating work overall. It has its flaws, though, one of them being poor sound quality in spots. Another thing that I thought was pointless was apparently cutting the movie’s running time down and switching some of the removed footage over to a “bonus features” setting. I’d rather not have bonus features on a disc if you have to sacrifice the ebb and flow of your movie just to pander to the demand for extra stuff.
There is a lot of on-camera speculation as to Charlie’s motive in exterminating his family. There were no tangible clues left behind as to what might have caused it. I think that sometimes we look for deeper meanings to some things that do not appear kosher on the surface. Sometimes, though, it’s just better – maybe more difficult – to accept the fact that something this cruel is little more than just plain meanness and leave it at that. God knows that the human race has excelled in treating each other terribly.
I also found it a bit odd to hear bluegrassed-up versions of Christmas hymns being placed over recreated scenes/photos of the murders. Seemed a bit over the top to me.
Then are location shots of the Lawson family burial site at Browder Cemetery in Germanton. They were interred next to each other, decked out in the finest clothes they ever had. The clothes were new; they were killed while wearing them.
A weird, probably manufactured, twist to the story of their gravesite is told at the end of the film.
A man who is interviewed and otherwise provides commentary in the documentary, mentions that he once shuffled some leaves over to cover Charlie’s resting spot as well after having allegedly discovered that leaves were everywhere but there. He put a stick on top of the grave to keep the leaves intact. According to this gentleman, as he walked away and then looked back some 20 seconds later, the leaves were all gone, the stick had been moved and there was nothing but bare grass once again over Charlie. Good story. If it’s true.
The DVD was released by “Facets Video” of Chicago. I don’t know if this movie is still available or how you may wind getting your hands on one. The back of the box shows a phone number of 1-800-331-6197. There is a website listed, too: http://www.facets.org/. If you order it, tell ‘em Mike at the Splatting Nun site sent ya!
Every once in a great while, quite by accident usually, Karen or I will stumble across a documentary about a murder case with which we are completely unfamiliar. Such is the case with “A Christmas Family Tragedy: Legends of the 1929 Lawson Family Murders”. Karen found this DVD at one of the St. Louis County Library branches and immediately grabbed it. In turn, it “grabbed” us as well as we sat down to watch it.
It tells the story of Germanton, North Carolina, tobacco farmer Charles (Charlie) Lawson and how, one cold and snowy Christmas morning, he blitzkrieged his family and, climactically, turned the shotgun on himself. He also used the firearm as a bludgeon during the attacks.
The victims were Charlie’s wife, Fannie, and six of their seven children: Maybell (7), Mary Lou (4 months), Marie (17), James William (4), Raymond (2) and Carrie (12).
The oldest male child at 16, James Arthur Lawson (yes, there were two boys in the Lawson house named James), aka “Buck”, had been sent into town just minutes earlier to purchase more shotgun shells, not knowing that his father would pretty much use up the shells he’d had on hand then and there to commit the murders.
Had Buck returned to the farm just a bit sooner, he, too, would have been a victim. As it turned out, Buck, in the years that followed, had a hard time living with what happened and it drove him to drink. He was killed at the age of 32 in 1945 in a truck accident.
Ironically, the name Buck Lawson would be used as the “hero” for Billy Curtis’s character (a coinkydink, I’m sure) in the all-midget Western, “The Terror of Tiny Town” in 1938, some 9 years after the Lawson tragedy.
A ballad was written about the Lawson murders the year after the murders. It was recorded a number of times and in the end credits of the film, you hear a woman singing it acapella.
“A Christmas Family Tragedy” is a fascinating work overall. It has its flaws, though, one of them being poor sound quality in spots. Another thing that I thought was pointless was apparently cutting the movie’s running time down and switching some of the removed footage over to a “bonus features” setting. I’d rather not have bonus features on a disc if you have to sacrifice the ebb and flow of your movie just to pander to the demand for extra stuff.
There is a lot of on-camera speculation as to Charlie’s motive in exterminating his family. There were no tangible clues left behind as to what might have caused it. I think that sometimes we look for deeper meanings to some things that do not appear kosher on the surface. Sometimes, though, it’s just better – maybe more difficult – to accept the fact that something this cruel is little more than just plain meanness and leave it at that. God knows that the human race has excelled in treating each other terribly.
I also found it a bit odd to hear bluegrassed-up versions of Christmas hymns being placed over recreated scenes/photos of the murders. Seemed a bit over the top to me.
Then are location shots of the Lawson family burial site at Browder Cemetery in Germanton. They were interred next to each other, decked out in the finest clothes they ever had. The clothes were new; they were killed while wearing them.
A weird, probably manufactured, twist to the story of their gravesite is told at the end of the film.
A man who is interviewed and otherwise provides commentary in the documentary, mentions that he once shuffled some leaves over to cover Charlie’s resting spot as well after having allegedly discovered that leaves were everywhere but there. He put a stick on top of the grave to keep the leaves intact. According to this gentleman, as he walked away and then looked back some 20 seconds later, the leaves were all gone, the stick had been moved and there was nothing but bare grass once again over Charlie. Good story. If it’s true.
The DVD was released by “Facets Video” of Chicago. I don’t know if this movie is still available or how you may wind getting your hands on one. The back of the box shows a phone number of 1-800-331-6197. There is a website listed, too: http://www.facets.org/. If you order it, tell ‘em Mike at the Splatting Nun site sent ya!
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
INSIDIOUS
Here’s one of the few horror films in recent times that actually does live up to the hype.A young couple, Josh & Renai Lambert (and their three children), move into a home which, after only a short while, reveals itself to be haunted – both by marginally benevolent and largely malevolent entities.
Dalton, the oldest of the children, falls from an attic ladder and sustains a slight head injury. The next morning, Josh tries unsuccessfully to wake the boy up to go to school, so it’s off to the hospital they go.
The doctors diagnose Dalton as being in a coma, and yet they are only guessing this because his symptoms are things they’ve never dealt with before. After a time, the hospital can do nothing for him, so Dalton is sent home to lay in his room in his comatose state. A visiting nurse comes by to check on him, do vitals, etc.
Renai gets freaked out when odd occurrences begin to manifest, including a sighting of a very frightening entity in the baby’s room. After a time, she begs Josh to allow them to move out of the house. He reluctantly agrees but remains unsure that what his wife is feeling is real.
Once the family is situated in new digs, things start happening again. Josh’s Mom (Barbara Hershey) becomes quite alarmed and contacts an old friend of hers, Elise Rainier (Lin Shaye), who is a paranormal researcher, for a “reading” of the house. As it turns out, the house isn’t haunted – Dalton is. From there on out, it’s a race against time to bring Dalton’s soul back from the astral plane where it is trapped, so that the entity will not be able to possess the boy.
It would not be a spoiler, really, to tell you it is discovered that Josh, as a young boy, had a similar experience but has blocked it out for many years. The photos of the child Josh that he is shown as an adult are especially creepy and bring the adult Josh full circle, so to speak. To say anything beyond that about it WOULD be a spoiler and I’m certainly not going to do that.
Warning: There is some VERY disturbing imagery in this movie that may stay with you awhile, but, hey, this goes beyond your typical haunted house film.
Outstanding performances from Barbara Hershey (in her scariest role since “The Entity”) and the wonderful Lin Shaye as the kindly Elise. You may remember Lin from comedies like THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY and KINGPIN (she’s the landlady who accepts “servicing” from Woody Harrelson in lieu of his rent payments) and from the intense SNAKES ON A PLANE.
For what it’s worth, I will never be able to listen to Tiny Tim’s version of “Tip Toe Thru The Tulips” again and not think of INSIDIOUS. You’ll see what I mean.
Highly recommended for viewing after the kids have gone to sleep. Even then I can’t guarantee that there won’t be some nightmares in the house afterwards.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
DRACULA'S GRAVE, KITZINGEN, GERMANY, 3/3/81
Shot #1. This isn’t the real grave of Vlad Tepes, aka, Vlad Drakul, aka Dracula. It’s actually that of a town Burgomeister (Mayor) from Kitzingen, Germany, where I was stationed while in the Army from 1979-1982. Yup, I lived smack dab in the middle of a town whose main livelihood was the manufacture of wine.Word of the Dracula’s Grave site had reached my Dad back home in Festus, Missouri, when a small article about it appeared in a local newspaper. Dad sent me the clipping and remarked that the tomb would be something to see. My Cousin, Joe, was stationed about 12 km from where I was, so one weekend he and I left my apartment (which was very close to the cemetery) and sought out this location.
I remember it being an eerie site because of all the ornate carvings and illustrations it contained. The newspaper article had mentioned that the current Burgomeister of Kitzingen told of young American soldiers who would hang out at this location, no doubt full of brew of some kind or another, waiting for something to happen on weekend midnights. A resurrection, perhaps?
Of course, nothing did happen, but even so I never got drunk enough to want to do that. But I am very glad that I got here to see and photograph it.
Shot #2. Ornate ceiling design.
Shot #3. Another view of the ceiling.
Shot #4. This is what I presume to be the Family Crest.
Shot #5. Closer and better view of the gate with the skull over it.Surprised that Polaroid film has lasted as long as it did here, just over 30 years since I initially took the pictures. I guess this must be all I took, but I am in touch with a former 1st Battalion, 15th Infantry mate of mine, Kirk Trofatter, who says he has some photos of this place as well. Hoping he can find them and that they are better than my own photos.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
